The Professional Wingman's Guide to: Attracting the Bartender

Guys, we all love the bartender. They’re making your drinks — and they’re gorgeous. Throughout the night, while most guys gladly offer their hard-earned cash to these lovely ladies, they dream of one day when they’d be able to date them.



 So, how does that happen?


Now, before I go into this, it needs to be said that these women are to be respected just like any other woman. They’re there to do their job, first and foremost, and you need to never make her feel unsafe or uncomfortable to go to her place of work. As experienced as they are at dealing with drunk, aggressive men, there’s no excuse for disrespecting women.


If you want to give yourself a shot at the bartender, logistics are paramount. It’s already tough enough because they basically get hit on with every order. There’s no way you’re going to make it happen when the bar is packed, and speed is key for the bartenders to make drinks and money. So if you have eyes for a special someone, be selective about when you go to the bar or club.




Now, having said that, if you want to separate yourself from all of the other guys pining over the lady of your dreams, there are two move you can make — the “slow play” or the “quick draw.” For those who want to go big or go home, I’ll focus on only the “quick draw.”


The Quick Draw


This is great when the bar or club is a little busy, or if it’s love at first sight and you can’t leave the venue without giving it a shot.


Start off the night by tipping her well, but not too well. Typically 40-50% will do. It’s enough that she’ll notice, but not be turned off by the gesture. Pro-tip: if you want quicker service at any busy club, you'll want to do that for any bartender.


DON’T GET DRUNK! Leave the liquid courage for another night and focus on having a good time with your friends. As the night goes on, this will come to be especially important.


At some point, during the night, order a huge round of shots for you and your friends. Make them as simple as possible, and preferably, just one type of shot. If you can, help her prepare them and during that time, build some rapport, make her laugh, and show her that you’re not like every other guy who just wants to hit on her.




Once all the shots are prepped, if she’s allowed, offer her one of them. She’ll naturally appreciate the gesture and it’ll make your interaction more memorable. Then, right before last call, when the moment feels right, ask if she’d like to go somewhere a little more interesting than a club or bar.


If she says yes, the next round might be on her.


That strategy too bold for you? Reach out to me and I’ll tell you about the “slow play.”



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